Get to know yourself, get to know others, then follow the platinum rule: Treat people as THEY would like to be treated.
Yes, your parents didn’t get it completely right with their golden rule: Treat people as YOU would like to be treated. It’s about THEM not you. The golden rule is only a guideline when you don’t know someone.
Learn from me. I prefer to speak openly and honestly with others, but I’m not unkind and I’m seldom rude. I’ve applied this in my dealings with others because I thought they’d see me as having integrity and being committed to helping people grow by facing reality. Instead, I’ve earned the reputation of being intimidating or brutal (in some circles). If I’d followed the platinum rule things would’ve been different. I would have been more influential.